as a child, i never ONCE sat on santa's lap or got my picture taken with him. why? because i thought he might abduct me. so here's a shout-out to my grandma (may she R.I.P.) for instilling in me a healthy (?) paranoia and/or right-off-the-bat suspicion of all strangers. especially those wearing costumes or waving from the fields outside a penitentiary. God, i miss that woman.