Monday, February 28, 2005

off the hook

well, i bit the bullet. tonight, i purchased what can only be described as the cutest phone ever:). it's the red one, people....

even though it was totally snowing, michael and i braved the elements to procure me this little number. really, i needed it. my old phone had seen MUCH better days.

so now i have to download some cool ring tones and figure out all the nifty features of the built-in camera. but honestly, can i tell you - even with all the bells and whistles, i'm still most excited that it's red:).

yes, i know. i'm a dork.

call me!!

Monday, February 21, 2005


i am all turned up and flipped around and i feel like my head is spinning. this weekend was very eye-opening in terms of some bits of hope that have been hibernating and waiting for emergence. talks with friends brought ideas and wonderings about the possibility of taking a step forward in some pretty life-changing ways with michael. talks with michael brought about tears (good ones) and prayers and realizations of my fearful heart and all the ways in which God still has yet to open me up.

but suddenly, even with all that being said, i feel myself opening to second (or third or fourth) chances, to first inklings, to a dream that i didn't want to admit i dreamed. and somehow i can stand for someone to look at me more fully in the face and say what my heart needs to hear.

i'm ready to take the risk, Lord.

i'm ready to break down. break through.

Saturday, February 19, 2005

if you can't take the heat....

hello, world. it's been awhile, i know. let me sum up:

valentine's day weekend was lovely. michael came over on sunday and i made him from-scratch spanakopita, a lemon-garlic pork tenderloin, and belgian chocolate cups filled with raspberry sauce, lemon mousse, and fresh raspberries. then, valentine's day proper, he met me here after work and we feasted on jerk marinated game hens (roasted to a crispy mahogany color), herbed texmati brown rice, and roasted brussels sprouts and onions. after dinner, we had some champagne with raspberries that had been soaking in raspberry liqueur and some chocolates from whole foods. tuesday evening, michael took me to the brass elephant for dinner. this was my least favorite meal of the three (i had some problems with my entree and the food wasn't as good as i had remembered it being the last time i was there), but the service was stellar and we had a cozy little table tucked away in an alcove just for us:).

in other words, it was a 3-day food fest, and the rest of the week was sure to be all downhill from there....

tuesday went off without a hitch, but then wednesday evening, after removing a skillet from a 400-degree oven, i grabbed it to pick it up by its handle - NO OVEN GLOVE ON - and wound up badly burning all four fingers and the palm of my right hand. and yes, i AM right-handed.

long story short, michael came over, much crying and wailing ensued, and i managed to eventually swab on some ointment and wrap my hand, only after temporarily numbing it with some solarcaine spray. i then took a percocet and went to bed. work on thursday was maddening, since i had little to no use of my right hand. try writing with only your thumb. it doesn't work so well.

the good news is that i'm feeling much better now. my hand is blistered/scarred, and i can't move it in all the ways i normally would, but it doesn't hurt so much and i'm hoping it'll heal quickly so that i can get on with my life.

besides, i've been on a baking kick of late, and i'm not really that desirous of steering clear of my kitchen.

a brief word to the wise, though: if you truly can't take the heat, keep your potholders handy!

Friday, February 11, 2005

ocular jitters

my right eye has been twitching for three weeks now. but only while i'm at work. that might shed some light on my stress level of late. then again, maybe i'm slowly going blind. i once had a manager at a job inform me that eye twitching was probably nothing to worry about, but then, she said to me - calm as day - 'course, the last time MY eyes twitched, i had a stroke.

um, yeah. THANKS.

in other news, michael has been so sweet to me lately, it's making me cry at my desk. i seriously don't know what to do with myself and in the middle of the day, when you're shedding tears with a twitching eye, it makes you feel like some sort of overemotional freak. but i'm managing. i figure life could be a lot worse than having a man who loves you and cares about every element of your existence.

then again, i could do without the twitch.

Sunday, February 06, 2005

meet the fockers, lite

yesterday, michael and i drove down to his parents' house, my parents drove up from virginia, and the someday in-laws had their first gander at the 'other side.' i have to admit, i was kind of nervous about the whole scenario. i mean, my parents are great people - very entertaining and fun - but the same thing that makes them great can also be a little much sometimes. my mother, who is an extremely friendly and welcoming person, gets into 'storytelling mode' and the hits just keep on coming. she and i had made an agreement beforehand that there would be no telling of random family stories and no talking about her job (this, i knew, would be a longshot). but lo and behold, within five minutes of arriving, she was off with a bang....


michael's parents seemed to enjoy themselves, though, and his mom even talked quite extensively about some random family members (lots of names, very little context). somehow in my mind, that evened out the playing field a bit.

in the middle of all this story volleying, michael and i just kind of sat there, listening. i jumped into the conversation at a few isolated points - more as a way to remind myself that i was still present in the situation - but really, it was like a 4-hour talking marathon and after the first mile, i already knew there was no winning this race.

but that's okay; i figure they need to get all the niceties out of their system, and at least there was no arguing or talking of politics. all in all, it went rather well; the food was quite good, and michael and i are still speaking, so i count it a successful evening.

but as we drove home last night, i realized that it's strange to me that i'm at the stage in my life where the prospect of having in-laws doesn't seem so far-fetched. it's just another page in the story, i guess. so i wonder what will happen in the next chapter....