Saturday, September 25, 2004

this morning, i woke at 7:30 feeling ready to start the day. i showered and then padded quietly down the hall to wake salimah, who had stayed over last night. she got up and ready, and after having what will henceforth be known as the 'styrofoam peanut debacle,' we grabbed a quick mcd's breakfast and went to pick up michael for a trip to weber's farm. none of us had ever been there before, so we decided to try it out (i'm on a farmer's market kick right now). i wasn't super impressed by the produce, much of which you could buy at the grocery store for about the same price, but the baked goods looked pretty good and i got a peach praline pie, some cheese rolls, a couple of red and yellow peppers, some apple butter bbq sauce, some bananas, and a baby pumpkin for my desk at work (compliments of salimah). michael and i then dropped salimah off at home and headed to trinacria, an italian store by lexington market in the city. i scored a large can of olive oil (10 bucks), three bottles of decent-looking wine (4 bucks each!), some grated romano cheese (i like it better than parmigiano), some spices and tomato paste in a tube (love it!), and 59-cent pasta, which is really excellent stuff.

i feel like i made out like a bandit today:). now, michael is on his way over and we're gonna hang out and eat pie for the evening. bet you're jealous - i know. don't worry, i'll save you a bite!:)

Thursday, September 23, 2004

okay, well the last post is not an indication of how i've really been feeling for the last 5 or so days. much of my angst was resolved by saturday afternoon, and although it left me with a serious stomach ache, my heart wasn't hurting and i didn't have that pit of frustration inside of me.

the days in between have been mostly fine, save a few moments of agitation and anxiety over a dental visit and some car woes. i'm in a loaner right now until probably saturday morning, and while i'm not happy about it, at least the people at the dealership believe that there's something actually wrong with the vehicle (after i went down there for 2 hours and would not leave until someone saw what i saw).

it is unfortunate but true that sometimes things only get done if you make them happen. oh well.

in other news, i'm still liking my job. getting up to go to work in the morning doesn't leave me feeling ill like it used to. what a relief that is!

and the whipped cream of this week is that michael and i have been having some good talks and really enjoying our time together lately. thank the Lord for the big - and small - things!

Friday, September 17, 2004

i knew i should have stayed in bed.

my morning began with me stumbling out of bed groggily towards the bathroom and soundly slamming my left arm into the corner of my dresser, removing a half-inch strip of skin in the process. i rubbed it briskly to try and stop the searing pain before stepping into what turned out to be too-hot water, which slightly scalded my still-groggy self.

and all of this was before 7 a.m.

the whole day at work, i felt stiff and sore and generally sad for no real reason, and this was followed by some personal conflict, the details of which i will not discuss here. and did i mention that i lost a part of my cell phone earpiece? grrrrr!!!

suffice it to say that the events of this day have left me feeling annoyed, frustrated, still sore, and generally grumpy. pardon my complaining, but sometimes a bit of a rant is in order.

okay, well, /rant.

and i'm out.

Monday, September 13, 2004

southland in the springtime

last monday (labor day), as i sat in tony roma's eating some rather delicious ribs, i had a truly genius idea: make a sweeping road trip tour of the south in order to seek out the best bbq in tennessee. frankly, ideas like this come to me all the time; this one, i voiced out loud. salimah, who was sitting across the table from me, finger deep in sauce heartily growled out her reply in between bites...something to the effect of 'oh YEAAHHH.'

you see, we are carnivores. straight to the core. i apologize to all you who feel that beef and pork and chicken are off limits. not me, man. i am altogether into meat. in fact, i feel ill if i don't eat it at least once a day. (i prefer twice, but who are we kidding? sometimes, this isn't possible.) the thought of driving a couple thousand miles to eat some ribs in memphis, sitting in a blues club, with elvis souvenirs stuck in my suitcase (well, you CANNOT go to memphis and not visit graceland, can you?!) seems perfectly logical to me.

so, memphis it is. and then, if we're feeling spunky, we'll swing east and go to savannah, taking a chance to meet our favorite southern cooking lady, see all the weeping willows and the grand, sweeping front porches, drink sweet tea, and see what 'midnight in the garden of good and evil' was REALLY all about.

in short, i'm psyched. grill them piggies up. come springtime, we goin' south!!

Saturday, September 11, 2004

perhaps i will look back at this time as that of pub cheese on crackers and evening bubble baths, of going to bed early and waking up alone, of driving through the misty hills on my way to work, nothing but the sound of the wind in my ears.

today as i scrubbed the sink and watched the soapy water swirl down the newly shiny drain, i realized how quickly things can be erased, how in an instant all that you once saw before you can be gone...how all the days and months of living can wash away with one swipe of anti-microbial cleanser.

please don't get me wrong. i was not feeling melancholy. my life these days is actually rather satisfying to me. i get up early, quickly get ready for work, have some oatmeal, spend 8 hours fine-tuning curriculum that will be used by children all over the world, come home, have a simple dinner, talk to friends, and then go to bed at a reasonable hour, only to begin it again the next day. there is structure. there are clothes in my closet from which to choose. my bank account is tenuous but managing. my parents and i talk at least once a week and try to see each other every month or two. my close friends are just as close as ever. i sleep pretty well, for the most part, and my world is without much in the way of drama.

things are fine. good, even. stable. it is as though some maids have come through and done their magic. it still feels like my life, in so many ways, but it's been given a fresh coat of paint and some scrubbing. and i'm freed up to focus on the beauty rather than the dirt in the corners. i can enjoy those small moments again, the way i did when i was a little kid and everything was full of promise. when bubble baths made my whole day and a shiny sink was more a masterpiece than a chore.

perhaps i will see this time through rose-colored glasses someday...when kids are rushing all around me and the roast is about to burn in the oven. then again, perhaps i see it now through those same glasses....or maybe i do see it with the lens of truth: every day, every moment is a gift. may God continue to make my heart truly grateful for all the days i have seen, for all the hurts and all the shame and all the loneliness that drove me into His arms. to be able to see my world shine again is a greater gift than i could have ever imagined.

thank you, Jesus.

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

tiny bubbles....

i just had the most delicious bubble bath ever! i spent the last 3 hours at work not feeling well today (stomach issues) and i was praying to God that time would move along rather quickly so i could get out of there. the last three hours seemed like an eternity, especially since my stomach was precarious at best. but, by the time i got in the car, i felt that my mission to get home quickly would be accomplished....and so it was. i made it home in just under 15 minutes! i came quickly upstairs, checked my e-mail, scrubbed out the tub, and then filled it up with soapy, hot water and slipped in, feeling my tense muscles relax and my cares dissolve into the bubbles....

this is starting to feel like a calgon commercial....

anyway, suffice it to say that i feel REALLY relaxed right now. so much so that i fear it may be difficult to stay awake until bedtime. thankfully, i've got some work to keep me busy and i may just move my laptop in front of the tube so i can kill two birds with one food network show:).

Monday, September 06, 2004

s'lovely

despite the overcast skies and rather dreary feel to the day, salimah and i arose mid-morning, got ready, and drove out to westminster to pick up some delights from this quaint place. collectively, we scored cherry, peach, and blueberry pies, pumpkin butter, freshly baked rolls, dried dill dip mix, and fresh corn, tomatoes, potatoes, and peaches. i can't wait to have some fresh veggies with my dinner tonight:).

after that outing, we were both rather hungry, so we made a stop for some ribs (delish!) and then dropped my things home before going to retrieve her mom's wallet from the site of their dinner from last night.

saturday, michael and i had taken salimah her gifts and then out for an italian lunchtime meal. salimah and i then spent the rest of saturday vegging at my place, watching movies, and eating leftovers from lunch, as well as some slightly overbaked lemon bars.

then, sunday, we went to the mall where she got some new clothes and a briefcase, and we both procured various other sundries at the dollar store (don't get me started about how much we love this place)....we then went back to her place to set up all her new things and so that her mother and jim could come and take her out to dinner (see reference to wallet debacle above). i stayed at her place while they were out and got some much-needed work done. plus, it allowed us to spend another evening and day together hanging out, and left just enough time last night for a quick trip to RITAS:)....

so, in summation, salimah's birthday weekend was all about shopping and food and hanging out. just the way we wanted to spend it. tomorrow it's back into the swing of things, but i feel refreshed and renewed a bit to start all over again. besides, next weekend, there's a women's retreat, and that promises to be a lovely time as well.

s'wonderful, dontcha think?

Saturday, September 04, 2004

dearest salimah joylynne,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

you, my friend, are only getting better with age....here's to another year of madcap fun and adventures, much laughter, and happiness beyond measure. i pray that all for you...and more.

love always,
sarah elizabeth